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#335879 - 09/15/07 10:33 AM Monster Dog
LineMtnCooner Offline
trapper


Registered: 01/20/07
Posts: 1603
Loc: Northumberland County, PA
I had to write this for school last year. I had to write about one of my chores that I don't like doing. Just thought it would be fun to post...


I hate feeding my dog Mason,
And filling his ten-gallon water basin.
And depending on his mood,
I sometimes have to give him extra food.

When the ground is muddy,
He always wants to play and be my buddy.
Other days he wants to play,
I don’t have the time in my day.

It frustrates me at points,
Because it hurts my joints.
But I’d rather have him getting mud all over,
Than my dog, Mason’s, life being over.
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#336991 - 09/16/07 06:02 PM Re: Monster Dog [Re: LineMtnCooner]
mntrapperboy Offline
trapper


Registered: 07/08/07
Posts: 1103
Loc: Minnesota
nice poem
_________________________

just try and run

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#369926 - 10/14/07 02:41 PM Re: Monster Dog [Re: mntrapperboy]
BlakeTheTrapper Offline
trapper


Registered: 02/10/07
Posts: 4373
Loc: bethany,missouri,,,still a pup
very nice
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Spring/Summer
Mice-2

****On the outdoor channel at july 3rd my cousin will be huntin turkeys.It's a new show.****





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#371018 - 10/15/07 12:17 PM Re: Monster Dog [Re: BlakeTheTrapper]
LineMtnCooner Offline
trapper


Registered: 01/20/07
Posts: 1603
Loc: Northumberland County, PA
Thanks guys!
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#373122 - 10/16/07 11:30 PM Re: Monster Dog [Re: LineMtnCooner]
James Moderator Offline
"Frostbite Jimmy"
trapper


Registered: 12/26/06
Posts: 1491
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
Good to see your poetry, and I wish NYNovice would show up, as he knows more about poetry than I do.

Your meter is off. Poems that rhyme are supposed (conventionally) to have consistent meter in the rhyming lines. For instance, your poem has eight feet (syllables) in the first line and eleven in the second. Better meter might go something like:

I hate feeding my dog Mason,
And filling his water basin.
And depending on his mood,
I have to give him extra food.

Keep rhyming!

Jim
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Moderator:  NYNovice, James 
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