I'm livid

Long story short, kids were fighting over the tablets and puppy then started being disrespectful and disobedient to me mother in law butts in and tells MY kids not to listen or respect me. Told her to get gone but nooo then starts talking garbage and that she and others want to kick my ..... told her to step up call them over and come try. I'm livid she is encouraging such disrespect and disobedience in MY home.

I'm thankful the kids are here right now.

It is mother-in-laws station in life to be bothersome.

True, but why does she think it's ok to allow bad behavior and disrespect?

How would you all handle an in law at your house that's encouraging your kids to be disrespectful and disobedient?

There’s the door use it and don’t come back untill you can follow the rules of the my house

Far as I know grand parents have no right of visitation

I have a cousin that had a similar experience with his mother in law result was that she has not seen or talked to her grand kids in something like 8 years

Knowing the story I would have kicked her out a lot sooner

Two older generations helping teach the younger generation how to resolve their differences and how to treat others and get your way; and we want to blame government for these type of society changes.

Bryce

You'll have issues with your wife, but you're mother in law should never enter your property again or see your children. You are right to be angry. What she did is unforgivable.

Keith

Have same issues with my 2 boys and their grandmother's. They want to spoil them rotten an by the time they get home we have to restart the manners,showing respect,an how to say ma'am and sir. Funny how one weekend can have such a bad affect on children

I've dealt with the same situation, my mother and father in law do not come to my house they know they are not welcome. I told my wife if she has a problem with it to remember I didn't hate being single. I provide well for my family and treat them right, I will not be mistreated in my own house. I hate rude behavior in women children and dogs, at 32 years old I will not tolerate it

Your house your rules. Let the rules be known right up front.

If need be print them out and post for all to see. Be respectful in explaining to them of the rules.

Then maybe they'll understand from the get-go how its supposed to be.

Especially on a second marriage and new and old in-laws.

Rude behavior should not be tolerated in one's home, that being said my MIL is the kindest person I know. Must skip a generation.

I had typed a good story of dealing with a mother in law many years ago. My first one. Some how it got deleted before I finished the story. So I will give you the punch line.

The old coot wanted to stay way too long when visiting and I had enough. No kids involved just an aggravating woman that needed to go home asap and not to come back hopefully.

I bought a couple of those slinky silicone spiders that use to climb slowly down the wall when you would throw them and they stuck. They would slowly walk down and drop at some point when they lost contact with any surface area to grab on too.

I threw one of those crawling spiders above the old coot and it stuck perfectly above her and it eventually fell into her lap while reading a news paper one evening. OMG I nearly lost all composure trying to act innocent when she went to screaming frantically.

Of course the wife ran to see what was going on and just gave me a look that I ignored of course.

Magically a few days later the mother in law went home. Of course there were other circumstances that may have contributed. Such as wearing skunky clothing home and wanting to have a conversation with her. Of course bait making day and the lingering odor that will last for days on clothing that I hung by her jacket in the hallway.

I believe the accumulative effect was very effective. LOL

Call me a bad man or whatever you like I did what needed to be done.

Thanks everyone I appreciate it.
My wife gets back shortly after I posted, then her mom starts the water works and lying about it and the situation. Wife sides with her mom for the most part and didn't say anything when I told her mom wants the kids to be disrespectful and disobedient.

My wife knows how I feel about her mom and don't want the kids with her. She doesn't care.
It's been a long morning.

To be honest I was raised never to hit a woman but boy I was hoping she would've stepped to the plate and have been waiting for her family to come to the plate. Never have I had that feeling before towards any woman.

Make matters worse today is rough health wise I woke up in bad shape and it's only gotten worse.

A fellow once told me if you let someone make you angry, they have beaten you.

You don't need to throw anyone out that you never let into your house! LOL

Put the kids in another room, grab the old crow by the back of her collar and toss her out the front door.


Your welcome.

Osky

My MIL can be a witch too. I've shown her to the door more than once... And by "shown her to the door" I mean that I get a belly full and say something so outrageously hateful that she sees herself out, usually in a huff. A few times in tears.

After I do that she behaves for a while and then starts getting brave. Then she ramps it up until I give her both barrels again...

Only thing I really have going for me is that my wife likes her mom even less than I do. She used to let her mom step all over her feelings. Then when she saw how I handle things she realized the world wouldn't end if she told her mom to go soak her head.

Adam, I can't offer any advice on how to handle this. I can only relate and tell you how I handle it. My approach likely won't work for you since all situations are different.

Best of luck to you bud.

Mike

Three thanksgivings ago we were sitting down in my home just about rdy to eat an my in-laws said the wrong thing to me in my own home. After my wife removed the kids from the table I saw fit to give them the how it's gna be under this roof or there is the door.....well I enjoyed my dinner with my wife and kids. Had alot of leftovers lol!!!! relationship has been alot better with in-laws ever since then. Although the Christmas after was a little odd

y oh its forgivable...but shell never ask for forgiveness. I'd not have her there Again unless she did.

Done that, the old crow came back. But we've come to an understanding I provide the roof overhead and food on the table and she stays out of my way.

See, in the end it works.

Osky

You got bad luck Adam-always in trouble with your inlaws or neighbors.

I have been married to my wonderful wife for 10 years and dated for 6, and her mom has been incarcerated over half the time, and if she gets to aggravating us, I can make a call to the sheriff's office and they'll come pick her up because she's always got a warrant on her. Lol

My mother in law is weird and I make a lot of mother in law jokes about her but she’s actually a good gal. I enjoy her company. I’ve been with my current wife for 22 years. I was married briefly in my early 20’s and that mother in law was a train wreck. I remember my ex-wife’s mom, grandma, and aunt all came over one morning and told me my house, furniture, and fridge looked like crap and they were going to redecorate so they needed me to leave. I in much different words encouraged them to have sex with themselves. They filed out of the house in short order and never came back. I was divorced within a year- my decision. Never looked back. Thanks God we had no kids. My wife found her on Facebook a few years ago and told me to take a look. I’m guessing 350 lbs. maybe more. My current wife is much better looking, has been a great mom, and has great parents. I feel like I dodged a bullet.

Hate to say this but until your wife sees the problem and steps up on your behalf you're screwed. Since it's her family she needs to be the one to tell her mother to knock this bleep off. If you two aren't united on this front mama will keep the advantage and drive a wedge there.

reading all the drama from the inlaws reminds me to update my tinder profile
looking for sexy white curvy girl with good teeth that loves to cook ,clean fish and skin squirrels whole family must have died in plane crash .... did i come on to strong with the teeth ?


poor Adam bad enough he has all the health issues now this ......

Thanks everyone I appreciate it.
The Wife, that's true, unfortunately she will back her parents up everytime, because she wants to keep her hands in their pocket. She knows I can't stand the kids spending the night at her mom's because it's a party house especially on weekends and the kids are usually upstairs alone while their grandma parties downstairs.

If yer gonna let others run the show your gonna have to live with whatever comes along..........whose kids are they again?

I wouldnt have anything to do with a woman who didnt have my back. been there, done that, it blows bigtime.

I kicked her out, and kept the kids.

Interesting thread. I was fortunate in that my wives mother kicked the bucket before we got married.

WS

You got bad luck Adam-always in trouble with your inlaws or neighbors.

I agree with Boco,you sure have run a long string of troublesome.
Have you taken time with her to explain your reasoning?

Dont worry about the inlaws so much. Fix the problems with the kids. They don't need their tablets. Break em if they aren't going to respect their parents.

Too many parents let the insane run the asylum.

After seeing the title of the thread, I'm just glad you're not "ON A RAMPAGE"!

You have my sympathies.

I'm with you. Daughter got to watching TV every morning. She's intelligent but honestly I think she's bored. Testing came back a little low for her age when she's always done pretty well. She's doing reading or writing every morning with me from the time she wakes up until she goes to school now. I think this day and age people expect technology to be the parent. I don't have to worry about what my inlaws do with the kids because they know how they're expected to act towards older people. If your children are disrespecting you I don't know I'd lay the first line of blame on your mother in law.

Thanks everyone I appreciate it
Boco one of my old bosses used to tell me... if it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have any luck.

Yup tried reasoning with her recently on their disrespect and disobedience she don't care.
Dd, I really think it was the kids being here that made me not lose it I was about to explode.

The problem comes from my wife letting her parents spoil the kids and letting them do what they want. Then when they come home it's rules, respect and obedience. I never wanted them to have tv in their rooms so their grandpa buys them a tv and DVD players. This summer she decided to get satellite in their rooms. As tablets are concerned I'm ok with 15-30 minutes but then it's tantrums and she gives in. About a month ago the same grandma allowed my kids to get a puppy/rat without asking us. Guess who takes care of it? Me. Just waiting for a hawk to take it away.

Slowly she is becoming like her parents and it's not good, so when I enforce rules you can imagine the chaos which ensues and I'm the bad guy. Her parents are a big problem in our lives and she won't cut them off.

If you pray please pray for us.

It's time to grow a set.

God helps those who help themselves.

I've seen so many posts from you that are basically the same. Problems on the res, people lying about you, (but you know the old saying about smoke and fire....). You live in a toxic environment, family wise. If you don't do anything about it soon you better just accept being a doormat and sleep outside with the dog/rat. I feel bad about the health problems in your family, but a wife who does not respect or rationally discuss raising the kids, doesn't care about your opinions, not to mention the MIL and FIL, are things that only you can do something about. If you go off the deep end one day with your MIL there will only be more hysteria and drama. Sounds to me like your wife is the portal for the problems you tell us about.

My wife and are both independent people and have had our disagreements over 35 years, but we always have each other's support.

I wish you the best, but other folks wishing and praying for you isn't going to change anything in your house.

No need to respond to me. It's not my business, but I've seen too many of your posts like this one.

Pete

Why do they still have the TVs in the rooms? Why do they still have the satellite? Why in God’s name do you still have the rat dog? Whose house is it? If the grandparents bought the stuff, leave it on their doorstep. They can buy whatever they want but it doesn’t have to live in your house. It would be great if your wife supported you, but you can enforce your rules even if she doesn’t. If she wants her mother around, she’d better teach her to behave. It’s like teenagers: you don’t have to like the rules, but you can follow them or live somewhere else.
We all feel for you, but it’s time to listen to Paul and Pete (swift).

Yes adam, I am livid too. Livid because I don't get why you haven't stood up for yourself. Yes my sympathy on your health issues,I have them too. But it's time to suck it up and put your foot down or walk away and get your custody rights.

At least sooner or later your kids will realize who spoils and who Royals as the Parent.Don't prolong the pain and do it now!!! This can't be helping your health issues and heck, who knows if your fix it or walk away you may even feel better. Good Luck adam.

Best advice this whole thread !!!



RTT

prayin for strength for ya bud.

I'm lucky, I have the best ex- MIL. I get along with her better than my own mom. When I divorced their daughter, she said you divorced her not us. Adam, time to put your foot down and like the boss said- grow a set.

Thanks everyone I appreciate it. I'll sit them all down tonight and have a good talk with them all. I let my wife know exactly my feelings last night. She had no rebuttal and knows I was in the right.

Don't get me wrong I do stand up for myself but my wife feels she can I ignore me and what I say because I can't work due to my health. (Last weekend fixing the mailbox took me nearly 2 days dig 18" deep hole neighbor welded the post, I poured and finished the mailbox). The kids see how she treats me and are learning it from her. I put my foot down they throw a tantrum and she caters to them. I've taken tablets and the TVs away yet they get them back or get parents bring more. I've had enough and this week she'll she I'm not messing around we have an appt together and it won't be pretty for her.

She is a big problem for the last year. I meant my vows to her & to God and I don't want a divorce and have been trying to work it out and take her counseling but she doesn't want to go. I'm not paying the fee again if both don't go it's considered a missed appt. I have gone through the biblical approach of bringing witnesses elders& pastors and she could careless then feeds them lies.

Prayers do work, she hasn't been walking with God for the last year and few months and had been loving living in sin and last weekend she went back to church and joined a bible study. Please keep them coming.

LDW that sounds like her step family they love me and have my back.

Skip the talk and take the TVs straight to the dump.

The electronics seem to always come back. Can't count how many tablets they have had. They are on their 2nd set of TVs. Even my mom will randomly buy or give them tablets. My mom doesn't spoil them in comparison and I told her to stop giving/ getting them electronics and she did after the 2nd time.

The sad part is my kids are very smart and yet want to spend the day with their face in a screen. I don't allow it except for the small window I give them one a day even if there's the homework that has to be done online.

Question for the grandparents on here, do you listen to your kids rules regarding their rules for their kids or not?

Time to pack and move the whole works Adam.

I don't know what your whole health situation is but the longer you let her be the sole breadwinner it's going to get worse.,

I am happy with my MIL. Haven't talked or seen her in six years. Only married for five.

...is she aware that an “angry face” post was put on trapperman about it?

...that’s some serious stuff right there ...ought to let her know you went on and did it....tell her next time it’ll be the “Eye roll” if she doesn’t shape up with a quickness !

LMAO, I love the smell of sarcasm.

'with a quickness'........Savell is on the weed.

Lol thanks I needed that laugh

Well, do your kids respect you?

If so, I'd pull them aside, and without bad-mouthing their grandmother you should lightheartedly explain to them that grandma isn't quite right in the head. Make a little joke out of it. If you lose it emotionally you'll lose the battle and maybe the war.

If your kids don't respect you it might be too late to do much.

They do, I do explain to them but yet since they see their mom and grandma doing it they think it's ok. Yes I've talked to their mom about it and constantly remind her to at least show respect in front of the kids

I'd show her the door,She should show you respect all the time,not just when the kids are around.Sounds like it aint gonna get any better,time to cut your losses and take control of your future.

So you're saying your wife doesn't respect you either? That's a much bigger problem than you MIL not respecting you.
Maybe it's time for help from a third party. You might both need a little tune-up; just sayin.

The apple often does not fall far from the tree.

Use both of those women for urinal mints and move on. Lol

Next thing she'll be moving her boyfriend in and you'll be living in the basement.LOL.

It is waggler, She just started doing that within the past few months. She sees me having seizures or struggling to walk and talk and says I'm faking. I've tried getting us counseling and to talk with pastors but she refuses to go.
No it doesn't pwc.
Good thing I don't have a basement

At that point he'd be better off just taking up roomies with canvasback.

I would guess when you were married you and your wife made vows to support each other in good times and in bad times. This would be a bad time because of your medical problems, which because of the vows are both of your problem.

I am not saying your wife will cheat, but every time I see this post I keep think of the old Kenny Roger's song. In some ways, by not defending you and standing united with you, your wife is cheating you.

Ruby, Don't Take Your Love To Town"

You've painted up your lips and rolled and curled your tinted hair
Ruby, are you contemplating going out somewhere?
The shadow on the wall tells me the sun is going down

Oh, Ruby,
Don't take your love to town

It wasn't me that started that old crazy Asian war
But I was proud to go and do my patriotic chore
And yes, it's true that I'm not the man I used to be

Oh, Ruby,
I still need some company

It's hard to love a man whose legs are bent and paralyzed
And the wants and needs of a woman your age, Ruby, I realized
But it won't be long I've heard them say until I'm not around

Oh, Ruby,
Don't take your love to town

She's leaving now 'cause I just heard the slamming of the door
The way I know I've heard it slam one hundred times before
And if I could move I'd get my gun and put her in the ground

Oh, Ruby,
Don't take your love to town

Oh, Ruby,
for God's sake turn around

Keith

Hi, livid. How ya doin?

Lol pass-thru
Yes KeithC, I meant my vows I made to her and God in front of friends and family. I refuse to give up on my marriage.
Hi Marty, I woke up good even with the kids bouncing off the walls. How are you?

I meant my vows to my wife too, but what you said above is too much. That is complete disrespect and plain dangerous. If I had your health problems and my wife did what yours did, it would be over. Your above sentence shows ZERO love from her.
I'm truly sorry that you are dealing with your health problems and your wife.

You said you refuse to give up on your marriage, but it sounds like she already has....