#683354 - 04/16/08 02:41 PM
Dumbest thing a customer said...
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trapper
Registered: 04/09/07
Posts: 6882
Loc: Central Ohio
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..on a lighter note....  Dealing with wildlife, at times, means also dealing with people...and some of the stuff that comes out of their mouths...well, it's darn right unbelieveable!  So, here's a chance to tell us some funny questions or comments you hear from the people you work for. Ok......so a lady calls me and says she has a "mole problem"...and I start to discuss the details over the phone...."Mine are big," she says, "Almost three feet tall". "Really...three feet, what makes you think that"? I asked. "Because I saw one sitting up under the apple tree, eatting an apple this morning", she says.  Trying not to laugh...I say, "Oh, you must mean a groundhog ma'am..." to which she replies,..."Isn't that the same thing"?  ( God luv'er ) 
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#683356 - 04/16/08 02:43 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: LT GREY]
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trapper
Registered: 12/22/06
Posts: 1430
Loc: St Louis, Missouri
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You see sonny this is how you.....
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#683450 - 04/16/08 04:20 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Barkstone]
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trapper
Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 399
Loc: Syracuse, New York
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LT, you beat me to it, had the same thing happen yesterday, lady said she had two moles in her yard. She descibed them as being "big as a beaver",she had woodchucks also.
Had a young guy call yesterday,helping his dad with a squirrel removal in his dads home. First they removed and relocated a couple squirrels, without checking if they were nursing. Then they loaded the attic with Ditrac, and it is all gone. He wanted to know if I could come by and try to find out where that "God awfull smell" was coming from. I guess he didn't like the price I told him because he hung up on me.
It's always an adventure doing this for a living. You can never tell what is on the other end of the phone,sure keeps it interesting.
_________________________
Albert Burns
Animal Control Services of C.N.Y.
7700 DeVaul Road
Kirkville, New York 13082
1-315-415-7509
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#683548 - 04/16/08 06:02 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Albert Burns]
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trapper
Registered: 04/09/07
Posts: 6882
Loc: Central Ohio
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Classic, Albert! They always know more than us..........
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#683786 - 04/16/08 08:05 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: LT GREY]
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trapper
Registered: 12/22/06
Posts: 1280
Loc: Billings Montana
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LT just like they want the skunks gone but don't want to keep their dogs restrained. Then wonder why their dog got sprayed if the skunk was in the live trap already....
_________________________
Ordinary men can do extrodinary things....
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#683854 - 04/16/08 08:33 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: mtbadger]
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trapper
Registered: 09/30/07
Posts: 485
Loc: Mojave Desert, AZ & CA
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"But coyotes would'nt kill my little (insert pets name here), they were always playing with her/him and besides, I always left some pet food out for them"
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#683918 - 04/16/08 09:00 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Latrans]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 218
Loc: Menlo Park, California
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And I get calls all the time for "woodchucks" and "groundhogs", which we don't have here in CA.
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#683931 - 04/16/08 09:07 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: SteveAlbano]
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trapper
Registered: 12/22/06
Posts: 2584
Loc: Pacific Northwest WA
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"Can I mail you a Check????"............
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#683964 - 04/16/08 09:21 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: SteveAlbano]
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trapper
Registered: 11/16/07
Posts: 34
Loc: northern Calif.
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I get about half a dozen mountain lion calls a month and 99.9% of the time when I get to the ranch and check out the kill site I have to tell the rancher "This is no lion kill it's a dog kill.And many times I have to tell them that that dog in the back of their truck is one of the dogs that killed their stock. Doesn't make for a happy rancher. In fact I told this to one of my ranchers that had just lost 13 head of eues and lambs and when I showed him the bloody wool caught under the brass name plate on the dogs collar, without saying another word he reached into his truck,pulled out a rifle, walked to the back of his truck called the dog out and shot him on the spot! What really took me back somewhat was when he told me "I just paid almost five thousand dollars for that dog two weeks ago at the bull sale!"
Bob
_________________________
Probtrapper
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#683974 - 04/16/08 09:24 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Vinke]
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trapper
Registered: 01/28/07
Posts: 1036
Loc: Georgia
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I got one now that has rats waiting for her to turn on the water.
Every time she turns on the faucet they run up and down the water lines.
_________________________
David R McLeod Animal Control Experts, LLC www.ace1ace.com
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#684091 - 04/16/08 10:37 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: warrior]
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trapper
Registered: 04/13/08
Posts: 5
Loc: PA
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I got a call the other day. Lady tells me she thinks rats are nocking over her 32 gallon trash can THAT HAS 2 BRICKS IN IT now thems some big rats LOL
_________________________
before you hit the ground what do you think about
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#684103 - 04/16/08 10:53 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: White owl]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 218
Loc: Menlo Park, California
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There have been many dumb things over the years, but the absolutely dumbest thing that stands out in my mind was this ditzy gal who insisted that a large potted plant on her second story balcony was dying due to gopher damage.
When I politely asked here how exactly a gopher could have got into a potted plant on a second story balcony, she insisted that the gopher must have been caught by a hawk, and accidentally dropped into the pot.
They're out there.
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#684115 - 04/16/08 11:06 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: SteveAlbano]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 218
Loc: Menlo Park, California
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OK, here's one more...about 15 years ago I got a "noises under the house" call from a college professor at Stanford University, supposedly a bastion of America's intellectual elite. A quick inspection of the perimeter revealed muddy raccoon footprints leading to a broken ventilation screen.
So I gave the prof the bad news, and when I explained the footprints and the broken screen, the guy was just dumbfounded that I had figured that out. After I did my setup and was about to leave, this intellectual powerhouse asked me one more time exactly how I had figured that out, so I once again showed him the muddy footprints and the broken out screen, and he just stood there shaking his head in disbelief that I had figured all that out.
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#684181 - 04/17/08 05:47 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: SteveAlbano]
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trapper
Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 399
Loc: Syracuse, New York
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I hate to even think about the money I made from smoke detectors, with a low battery.. Chirp , Chirp."Theres a bird in my house,and I just can't locate it,can you help?"
_________________________
Albert Burns
Animal Control Services of C.N.Y.
7700 DeVaul Road
Kirkville, New York 13082
1-315-415-7509
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#684220 - 04/17/08 06:53 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Albert Burns]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 711
Loc: Delaware County Ohio
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Now I am not a professional as most of you are but......
I get about 1/2 dozen calls a year with this same senario...
Hello, we are originally from the city and we bought a house on 5 acres in a woodlot out in the country and we are having terrible problems with (insert any Ohio woodland species here) getting into our garage, getting into our trash or getting under our porch. When we were looking at this place we saw no sign of wild animals can you tell me why we are having so many problems with them now?
_________________________
"If a man is alone in the woods and no woman can hear him is he still wrong?"
I support our troops and their mission.
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#684426 - 04/17/08 11:52 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Albert Burns]
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trapper
Registered: 12/26/06
Posts: 207
Loc: NY
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I hate to even think about the money I made from smoke detectors, with a low battery.. Chirp , Chirp."Theres a bird in my house,and I just can't locate it,can you help?" That brings back memories to the first call I ever went on with my father years ago. I was shocked to see that he got paid to find a low 9V battery in a dector in the basement and not a bird. Remember that call like it was yesterday.
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#684852 - 04/17/08 06:19 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: SgtBaldy]
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trapper
Registered: 04/09/07
Posts: 6882
Loc: Central Ohio
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Yep Sgt, they all think we're the SPCA, state financed, or something.........
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#686139 - 04/18/08 06:51 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: LT GREY]
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trapper
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 641
Loc: Mt. Olive, IL
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I'll limit my answer to "dumb stuff" in 2008. Too many to remember since 1990. The 2 dumbest remarks so far this year.... both from the same guy within 5 minutes time. I was doing a coon job a few weeks ago for him at one of his rental properties, and he started talking about animals. Wow, I think he should have saved these ridiculous bits of info for the coffee shop or grain elevator, where things like this seem to stem from......
1 - Rattlesnakes have crossed with black snakes, and now most of the black snakes around us are VENEMOUS, even though they do not appear to be.
2 - Illinois DNR has JUST released 27 (yes, twenty-seven) PAIRS of cougars.
It's really tough to keep my composure at times when I hear this nonsense. Must be our secret division of DNR at work..... I'd like to know who he thinks could actually trap and relocate 54 mountain lions. Yeah, that's gonna happen...... To think these kind of people are all around us..... SCARY.
Didn't bother telling him 3 nights before I spent 5 hours with our state wildlife resources director doing a spring spotlight survey in Montgomery county. It is truly amazing how many ridiculous stories are floating around about DNR activities, and in 5 hours I get to hear some hilarious stuff.
_________________________
Ron Scheller
thebatguy.com
Mt. Olive, IL
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#686898 - 04/19/08 11:18 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Ron Scheller]
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trapper
Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 1204
Loc: Syracuse,Utica-Rome,Madison,On...
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While cutting live honey bees out of a structure they always ask"You get stung much?" No only 2-3 hundred times a job but I'm tuff they die I don't!
bob evans cwcp
_________________________
Bird,live honey Bee,Unique wildlife problems SOLVED.
Serving the great state of New York
livetrappingbymatt.net
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#687070 - 04/19/08 01:47 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Bob Evans,-CWCP]
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trapper
Registered: 12/28/06
Posts: 16
Loc: IA
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I think these bees are Africanized (in Iowa)
PS I don't do bees
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#687118 - 04/19/08 02:36 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: badger]
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trapper
Registered: 09/21/07
Posts: 66
Loc: Northwest Missouri
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I like the, "You Gotta Come Immediately!" calls. They always seem to stem a few chuckles.
Had a lady call the other day with a complaint that something has been entering her kitchen every evening and eating her fresh baked cinnamon rolls. She says every day she puts out new rolls on the counter and every morning they come up missing. She's gotta have someone come today because she hasn't baked any and this critter will surely be upset if they don't get their fresh cinnamon rolls.....
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#687225 - 04/19/08 04:23 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Coppertrapper26]
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trapper
Registered: 03/20/07
Posts: 465
Loc: Okanagan Valley BC Canada
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My favorite dumb comment.....You mean I have to pay for this?
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#687799 - 04/20/08 06:09 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Pete]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 328
Loc: Idaville, Indiana
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But how could a raccoon get way up on my roof? I thought they only climbed trees!
_________________________
Trapper born & Trapper bred, I'll be a Trapper untill the day I'm Dead.
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#687843 - 04/20/08 08:00 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: tomstrap]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 2639
Loc: Southern Michigan 54
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Guy called and said, There's a Wolverine stuck In my fence.I said,I'm pretty sure It's not a wolverine sir. He said, Oh yea, I got on the Internet and the discription of a Wolverine fits It perfectly.When I got there It was a muskrat.
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#687889 - 04/20/08 09:02 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: coonmasterx]
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trapper
Registered: 12/22/06
Posts: 2584
Loc: Pacific Northwest WA
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Friday
I don't know what happened but...There are two dogs stuck together in my yard....can you help????? My reply.......I think he has it already figured out
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#687929 - 04/20/08 09:35 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Ron Scheller]
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trapper
Registered: 01/18/07
Posts: 1452
Loc: Osage Bluff, MO-31
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I'll limit my answer to "dumb stuff" in 2008. Too many to remember since 1990. The 2 dumbest remarks so far this year.... both from the same guy within 5 minutes time. I was doing a coon job a few weeks ago for him at one of his rental properties, and he started talking about animals. Wow, I think he should have saved these ridiculous bits of info for the coffee shop or grain elevator, where things like this seem to stem from......
1 - Rattlesnakes have crossed with black snakes, and now most of the black snakes around us are VENEMOUS, even though they do not appear to be.
2 - Illinois DNR has JUST released 27 (yes, twenty-seven) PAIRS of cougars.
It's really tough to keep my composure at times when I hear this nonsense. Must be our secret division of DNR at work..... I'd like to know who he thinks could actually trap and relocate 54 mountain lions. Yeah, that's gonna happen...... To think these kind of people are all around us..... SCARY.
Didn't bother telling him 3 nights before I spent 5 hours with our state wildlife resources director doing a spring spotlight survey in Montgomery county. It is truly amazing how many ridiculous stories are floating around about DNR activities, and in 5 hours I get to hear some hilarious stuff. I have heard the snake one around here also.  Another one going around here is that the Missouri Dept. of Conservation has been secretly stocking some farms with Timber rattlers. They will fly over at night and drop crates attached to parachutes. The crates break open when they hit the ground and the snakes are released!  When this old man told me this, I had to tell him, "I'll give you $500 for one of these crates with the parachute attached. There has to be a few out there if this is happening so often." I still haven't seen one yet.
_________________________
You could learn alot from a dummy.
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#688120 - 04/20/08 12:32 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: JeremyT]
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trapper
Registered: 04/09/07
Posts: 6882
Loc: Central Ohio
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Vinke ..."two dogs stuck together in my yard"...? hahahahahahahaha STOP IT!
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#691627 - 04/22/08 10:26 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: LT GREY]
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trapper
Registered: 12/09/07
Posts: 121
Loc: Missouri
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A client told me her moles were sitting up on the corner of her deck munching daffodils. Apparently, she sensed my skepticism, and brought out a snapshot - groundhog. Her husband then tried to act like he knew it all along.
Another guy told me his kids are missing playing on their swingset this spring, but he just doesn't feel it's safe for them, what with a mole run nearby: "I hear their teeth are sharp, and don't they carry rabies and (stuff)?"
_________________________
The older I grow, the more I listen to people who don't say much. -Germain Glidden
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#691640 - 04/22/08 10:35 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: MoFarmBoy]
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trapper
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 641
Loc: Mt. Olive, IL
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And I always heard that a squeaky swingset is another surefire way to rid a lawn of moles.....
_________________________
Ron Scheller
thebatguy.com
Mt. Olive, IL
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#692671 - 04/23/08 08:02 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Ron Scheller]
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trapper
Registered: 12/22/06
Posts: 2584
Loc: Pacific Northwest WA
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Wednesday
"Hi I drove by the field by (blanks) Wholesale Nursery...You know the one.....on the way to bring my kids to school....There were 4 horses all standing there in the middle.....After I dropped of the kids and was returning home I drove by the Field....And.....all the Horses were Laying down......" My reply........I will look into it Mam............
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#697387 - 04/28/08 05:18 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: SgtBaldy]
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trapper
Registered: 01/23/07
Posts: 931
Loc: Connecticut
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My favorite question on the phone from people.
"I have to PAY for the service?" I like that one. How about "no, you don't have to pay, we'll trade instead. Do you want to mow my lawn all summer, or reshingle my roof?"
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#697412 - 04/28/08 06:52 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Woofman]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 157
Loc: west michigan, 47
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2:00 A.M.
There's a barking dog locked in a car in front of my house. Will you come get it?
Is the dog locked in you're car?
No.
Then i suggest you call the sheriff if the dog's disturbing the peace, because i can't break into someones car and steal their dog.
Click, phone hangs up.
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#697470 - 04/28/08 08:41 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: johnd]
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trapper
Registered: 12/25/06
Posts: 217
Loc: sw PA
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"Would you like some baby raccoons?"
as for the parachuting rattlesnakes, around here the PA Game Commission does it to control the turkey population
"You're going to kill them? You are a very mean man."
_________________________
Sheriff! Taw Jackson's back in town!
You sure?
Well, he's ridin' down the street right now, big as life.
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#697478 - 04/28/08 09:03 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: Mike Barcaskey]
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trapper
Registered: 08/24/07
Posts: 204
Loc: CT
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There is a family of swans crossing I 95 ...Can you come save them ???
_________________________
Madd Trapper
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#697555 - 04/28/08 10:56 AM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: AAACOFCT]
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trapper
Registered: 04/21/08
Posts: 11
Loc: central coast, CA
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A lady walked by one of my gopher job, she was very upset when I told her I was trapping and killing the gophers. She said she has guinea pigs and loves rodents and gophers. She even celebrates rodent day every year? In her own yard she lets everything just live!
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#698268 - 04/28/08 06:17 PM
Re: Dumbest thing a customer said...
[Re: row]
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trapper
Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 4047
Loc: St. Louis Co, Mo
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Sounds like you may have a new place to dump your catch. Ask her.
_________________________
"Every kid needs a dog and a curmudgeon" 
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