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#2592871 - 05/26/11 11:56 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
frogskinner Offline
trapper

Registered: 05/14/10
Posts: 7
Loc: mn
Originally Posted By: Brennan
Originally Posted By: Bogmaster
If God did not have dating and girlfriends in mind-- there would have been--no Adam and Eve.
There is also nothing about,cars,computers or airplanes in the bible.But God gave man, the knowledge to create them.
Tom

Yes agreed. But I used to go to public school and pretty much all the 7th grade and up guys were only interested in girls in sometimes a bad way. I even lust sometimes even though in the bible it says not to. I try very hard not to though. But having girlfriend/boyfriend relationships is something that needs to be done through God.
Brennan-


well said I completly agree with you.
_________________________
I'm a Jesus Freak.

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#2593171 - 05/26/11 06:26 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
Pasadena Offline
trapper

Registered: 02/25/07
Posts: 1171
Loc: Ohio,45yrs old,
Don't mix my words. In no way did I compare women to cars or a house. Man was given freewill to choose. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. There is no way you know how much love a person can have for their spouse and to say you lose some with every relationship is pure speculation on your part with no proof to back it up.

That's exactly what I'm saying Brennan, dating is a learning experience to sort out what a person is looking for in a relationship.
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#2593259 - 05/26/11 07:43 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Pasadena]
SkunkWrestler Offline
trapper

Registered: 08/25/08
Posts: 3572
Loc: North of 2poor, MN
Originally Posted By: Pasadena
Don't mix my words. In no way did I compare women to cars or a house.

Originally Posted By: Pasadena
You don't buy a car without test driving it first, most folks don't buy the first house they walk through.


What Nathan is saying I think, and the impression I have gotten from most people who have been in many relationships, is that even if a guy can casually walk away from a relationship that clearly isn't going to pan out, girls tend to take it more personally, even if they see it wouldn't work out.
For example, take this coworker of mine who just ended a relationship with his girlfriend. He told her that she was being too demanding of him, that he had to focus on his job and his kids and couldn't devote as much time to her as she was asking. She told him that he had to give all or nothing, and so he said it would have to be nothing, because he really had other things to focus on. Now she is doing everything she can to get back together with him, even though they both know they can't really have a relationship that will suit them both, and he is ready to be rid of her.

Now, because I expect someone will use that as an excuse why a guy should date and learn as much as he can about different girls before he makes his move, here is an example of how I expect things would work out in a God-fearing Christian home with a husband and wife who are willing to make their marriage work:
Woman says guy needs to spend more time at home, focusing on her and the kids, instead of working his butt off and working on hobbies or watching football (a devoted Christian patriarch won't have kids with other women to worry about spending time with).
Man says he can't do that, because he feels he's not making enough money for them to live comfortably, and right now their relationship is on the back burner.
They talk things through, pray about it, and agree that she'll back off a little bit and maybe open up a small business in the home for a little extra income, and he will spend less time at his hobbies or watching football.

That's just an example, do you see what I mean though?
_________________________
Originally Posted By: NorthernOutdoors
Friendship is magic.


'Oh no, I found a PLANT growing in the WOODS and I think someone PUT it there!'

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#2593321 - 05/26/11 08:34 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
frogskinner Offline
trapper

Registered: 05/14/10
Posts: 7
Loc: mn
yep
_________________________
I'm a Jesus Freak.

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#2593450 - 05/26/11 10:25 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
Coonsnightmare Offline
trapper

Registered: 09/22/08
Posts: 2679
Loc: NY
It seems wierd that this changed from schools, to dating.
I think that you need to date! Dating helps you find what qualities you want in a person. So when you find that someone, you will know that they are right.

As for schools, I couldn't be homeschooled. I just feel like I would miss to much, and miss out on too much. One of the most important things about public schools is that you learn how to be social, and how to deal with people. Sooner or later you will need to learn how to deal with different kinds of people in this world.
_________________________
One Shot One kill
Think Smarter than the Snake

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#2593600 - 05/27/11 06:57 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Coonsnightmare]
Pasadena Offline
trapper

Registered: 02/25/07
Posts: 1171
Loc: Ohio,45yrs old,
I see what you're saying Toby but, any relationship whether dating or marriage has bumps in the road and sacrifices and understanding have to be made and given. It all depends on how each individual chooses to deal with the bumps is what makes relationships work or not.

I have a question for those that believe dating is a waste of time and effort with no learning experience gained from it. Ask your parents if they dated anyone else before getting married. Ask them if they feel they have less love for each other because they dated someone else.

Next, how does a person measure love anyways?




Originally Posted By: coonsnightmare
It seems wierd that this changed from schools, to dating.
I think that you need to date! Dating helps you find what qualities you want in a person. So when you find that someone, you will know that they are right.

As for schools, I couldn't be homeschooled. I just feel like I would miss to much, and miss out on too much. One of the most important things about public schools is that you learn how to be social, and how to deal with people. Sooner or later you will need to learn how to deal with different kinds of people in this world.


wink
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#2593608 - 05/27/11 07:14 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
SkunkWrestler Offline
trapper

Registered: 08/25/08
Posts: 3572
Loc: North of 2poor, MN
Coonsnightmare, I know it's a long thread by now, but we have discussed all those things already and are sufficiently bored with them wink I guarantee you a person can find those same qualities in someone without having to date them. I have seen many successful marriages where couples did not date.

I don't think it is accurate to say no learning experience is gained from dating, only a real fool fails to learn from his mistakes laugh

And for the record, both my parents say they wish they had done things differently, but neither one was really much of a Christian at the time.
_________________________
Originally Posted By: NorthernOutdoors
Friendship is magic.


'Oh no, I found a PLANT growing in the WOODS and I think someone PUT it there!'

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#2593612 - 05/27/11 07:24 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: SkunkWrestler]
2poor Offline



Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 8691
Loc: Lake Mille Lacs , MN
Originally Posted By: SkunkWrestler


What Nathan is saying I think, and the impression I have gotten from most people who have been in many relationships, is that even if a guy can casually walk away from a relationship that clearly isn't going to pan out, girls tend to take it more personally, even if they see it wouldn't work out.


I think for the most part that is a bunch of hooey !

Some girls can move on as fast, or faster then any guy.

Ability to move on emotionally in life would have far more to do with individual personality, then gender in my opinion.
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It is a lazy man that can't find his wife a second job !

http://mooseriverlures.com/

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#2593618 - 05/27/11 07:31 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
SkunkWrestler Offline
trapper

Registered: 08/25/08
Posts: 3572
Loc: North of 2poor, MN
Well, then you are probably the first person I've met who would say that girls aren't clingy to the first guy they date, and that they tend to feel loyal to them a long time after the guy has moved on.

I agree that personality can affect that response, but I haven't spoken to anyone else who believes it's entirely unrelated to gender. In a relationship, men and women have different needs which are based on gender, and it's hard to argue that those natural responses based on their needs are purely just a matter of personality.
_________________________
Originally Posted By: NorthernOutdoors
Friendship is magic.


'Oh no, I found a PLANT growing in the WOODS and I think someone PUT it there!'

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#2593680 - 05/27/11 08:44 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
sniper one Offline
trapper

Registered: 07/11/10
Posts: 0
Loc: Yell county, Arkansas
You know, after all of this I've read, I have came to a conclusion.

...What 2poor and all the other older guys have said...

They have already been through Dating and marriage and everything else that has been discussed. They are speaking from experience, and most of you guys are speaking just from what you think* will go down.
_________________________
If the lead doesnt fly, the meat doesnt fry!

Arkansas Trapper Jake 15 years old

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#2593712 - 05/27/11 09:22 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
SkunkWrestler Offline
trapper

Registered: 08/25/08
Posts: 3572
Loc: North of 2poor, MN
I respect the conclusion you have came to, but for you to say Nathan and I are purely speculating is just insulting. I could list successful marriages that didn't start with dating until the cows came home. People act like because dating is popular, it must be the best way to do things. But consider that before the 20th century, most marriages did not start with dating, and consider that in the past hundred years, the percentage of divorces has increased by a factor of ten. I'm not saying that is all due to dating, but it's hard to argue that none of it is due to dating.

Consider also that nowhere in the Bible does it say that a good relationship starts with asking a girl out to a restaurant or a dance. Most marriages started much more conservatively, and with plenty of supervision. How many people today are virgins until the day they are married? Wouldn't you say it's easier to resist that kind of temptation if you are constantly under supervision? Again, I'm not saying everyone who dates is not a virgin, I am saying that temptation is greatly increased in a dating environment.
_________________________
Originally Posted By: NorthernOutdoors
Friendship is magic.


'Oh no, I found a PLANT growing in the WOODS and I think someone PUT it there!'

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#2593735 - 05/27/11 10:11 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: SkunkWrestler]
Coonsnightmare Offline
trapper

Registered: 09/22/08
Posts: 2679
Loc: NY
Originally Posted By: SkunkWrestler
Well, then you are probably the first person I've met who would say that girls aren't clingy to the first guy they date, and that they tend to feel loyal to them a long time after the guy has moved on.

I agree that personality can affect that response, but I haven't spoken to anyone else who believes it's entirely unrelated to gender. In a relationship, men and women have different needs which are based on gender, and it's hard to argue that those natural responses based on their needs are purely just a matter of personality.


I have seen girls and guys that have tried to get as many boyfriends, or girlfriends as possible. Also Boys can be just as sticky after a break up as well. Its not gender IMO its the type of person you are.
_________________________
One Shot One kill
Think Smarter than the Snake

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#2593738 - 05/27/11 10:15 AM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: SkunkWrestler]
Coonsnightmare Offline
trapper

Registered: 09/22/08
Posts: 2679
Loc: NY
Originally Posted By: SkunkWrestler
Coonsnightmare, I know it's a long thread by now, but we have discussed all those things already and are sufficiently bored with them wink I guarantee you a person can find those same qualities in someone without having to date them. I have seen many successful marriages where couples did not date.

I don't think it is accurate to say no learning experience is gained from dating, only a real fool fails to learn from his mistakes laugh

And for the record, both my parents say they wish they had done things differently, but neither one was really much of a Christian at the time.


Are you saying that you know people who have not dated at al and gotten married? Just one day they decided that they loved each other? I'm sure that it didn't happen that way. They probably got out of the friend zone, were hanging out, and then decided that they loved each other.
_________________________
One Shot One kill
Think Smarter than the Snake

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#2593897 - 05/27/11 03:15 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
Pasadena Offline
trapper

Registered: 02/25/07
Posts: 1171
Loc: Ohio,45yrs old,
Wise for your years young lady. I was wondering the same thing. Two people see each other and head straight to get married? No correspondence between one another, no hanging out together, no eating together, no just walking together. Guess what. That's what folks do that are dating.
_________________________




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#2593915 - 05/27/11 03:45 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
white17 Offline

"General (Mr.Sunshine) Washington"

Registered: 03/17/07
Posts: 14673
Loc: McGrath, AK
I have way too much to add on this subject so I won't. But I will throw this out there for you to discuss.

Which is the better (or worse) situation.

1. two young people date for a few months or a year and one or both realize that the relationship is not meant to be. They break up. One is heartbroken, the other is not.

2. Two people meet but do not date. Somehow, they make the decision to marry. Two years later they have a child. 4 years later they have another. One year later they decide that the relationship was not what they thought, and breakup. At least 3 people are heartbroken, one may be angry, the kids are possibly without a parent, and the financial strain is hard on all of them.
_________________________
Mean As Nails

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#2593920 - 05/27/11 03:54 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
iwantacoyote Offline
trapper

Registered: 06/23/09
Posts: 1904
Loc: New York 19 yrs
but what about the people that date 4, 4 years and break up. they both waisted 4 years of there life..
im not saying u should meet somone and get hitched next week, love is blind and makes u ignore things u should be seeing but dating can be a waist of time after a few years


Edited by iwantacoyote (05/27/11 03:55 PM)
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#2593959 - 05/27/11 04:45 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: iwantacoyote]
Coonsnightmare Offline
trapper

Registered: 09/22/08
Posts: 2679
Loc: NY
Originally Posted By: iwantacoyote
but what about the people that date 4, 4 years and break up. they both waisted 4 years of there life..
im not saying u should meet somone and get hitched next week, love is blind and makes u ignore things u should be seeing but dating can be a waist of time after a few years



My mom always said that if I meet a guy, and after a year that he doesn't know if I am right. Then I should end it. Your right, people shouldn't date for years upon years. After a while you should know if the person in right, or wrong for you. Thats what dating is for.
_________________________
One Shot One kill
Think Smarter than the Snake

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#2593963 - 05/27/11 04:47 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Brennan]
white17 Offline

"General (Mr.Sunshine) Washington"

Registered: 03/17/07
Posts: 14673
Loc: McGrath, AK
Nope. It's all a learning experience.

I got divorced in 1967. I was in Vietnam and my wife met someone else. We had dated for three years and been married for two more. I was pretty broken up about it. I was whining about it to an older guy. Looking for sympathy. He said..,"that's great !" I said...."what do you mean great "? He said...."think about it. You spent 5 years with her. Aren't you glad you didn't waste 20 years before finding out it wasn't the right fit ?"

He was right. Dating is not a waste of time. People change. And men and women change at different rates. Sometimes they 'change away' from each other. It's no one's fault. It's just the way humans are built.
_________________________
Mean As Nails

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#2594123 - 05/27/11 07:45 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: Pasadena]
NathanY Offline
trapper

Registered: 09/20/10
Posts: 411
Loc: Indiana
Originally Posted By: Pasadena
I see what you're saying Toby but, any relationship whether dating or marriage has bumps in the road and sacrifices and understanding have to be made and given. It all depends on how each individual chooses to deal with the bumps is what makes relationships work or not.

I have a question for those that believe dating is a waste of time and effort with no learning experience gained from it. Ask your parents if they dated anyone else before getting married. Ask them if they feel they have less love for each other because they dated someone else. Next, how does a person measure love anyways?




Originally Posted By: coonsnightmare
It seems wierd that this changed from schools, to dating.
I think that you need to date! Dating helps you find what qualities you want in a person. So when you find that someone, you will know that they are right.

As for schools, I couldn't be homeschooled. I just feel like I would miss to much, and miss out on too much. One of the most important things about public schools is that you learn how to be social, and how to deal with people. Sooner or later you will need to learn how to deal with different kinds of people in this world.


wink


My dad says he has regrets from dating. and wished he would have just waited for God.
You see man has his way and God has his way. Ill chose Gods way.

I wish you all the best of luck. And hope your not in the 50 % who wish they hadn't dated.

True love isn't what you can get for yourself. But what you can give to others.
_________________________
Fight for Our freedom cause the government is taking it away.

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#2594141 - 05/27/11 07:51 PM Re: Homeschoolers VS Public School (moderators welcome [Re: SkunkWrestler]
NathanY Offline
trapper

Registered: 09/20/10
Posts: 411
Loc: Indiana
Originally Posted By: SkunkWrestler
I respect the conclusion you have came to, but for you to say Nathan and I are purely speculating is just insulting. I could list successful marriages that didn't start with dating until the cows came home. People act like because dating is popular, it must be the best way to do things. But consider that before the 20th century, most marriages did not start with dating, and consider that in the past hundred years, the percentage of divorces has increased by a factor of ten. I'm not saying that is all due to dating, but it's hard to argue that none of it is due to dating.

Consider also that nowhere in the Bible does it say that a good relationship starts with asking a girl out to a restaurant or a dance. Most marriages started much more conservatively, and with plenty of supervision. How many people today are virgins until the day they are married? Wouldn't you say it's easier to resist that kind of temptation if you are constantly under supervision? Again, I'm not saying everyone who dates is not a virgin, I am saying that temptation is greatly increased in a dating environment.


X2
I watched those who have dated and those who have not. I want to be like those who have not. 100% happy. No regret. and best of all they were pure when they got married! Purity isn't something thought of anymore. But i hold it of high value. And so does God.
I'm going on 18 having never ever kissed, held hands, Or any of that such. I'm not missing out smile Im saving it for my WIFE
_________________________
Fight for Our freedom cause the government is taking it away.

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Moderator:  2poor, Bogmaster, tmrschessie