Today I received an ultimatum from a friend.It seems he will not let me trap his hunting lease until I pay my so-called fur storage bill. About 3 months ago he let me store my furs in his shed(my freezer) and I told him I would pay the electric on it.
Now fast forward and I lost track of time and now he's getting bossy and telling me when I pay the bill I will be able to trap his place since I'm making money off the furs.
Now mind you,I have no problem with paying,just lost tracked of time and he won't give me an idea of what I owe.It just bites when a close friend suddenly turns and screws you.Just last week I processed a deer for him with my equipment (meat grinder and such)at his house which saved him about $40.00.But if I were to bring that up,then it would lead to an argument.Been friends for 33 years and don't feel like getting into a fight over petty things.But it sure does suck when you feel like your being given an ultimatum.
So,I'm asking? What would your take be on all of this and how much should I pay him per month? Sometimes I feel like I'm to nice to people......Dale

$5.00 a month would cover most freezers.

when he gives ya the amount of the electric bill, tell him youre deducting 40 bucks for processing his deer, LOL.

maybe he feels like you intentionally ducked out on the bill?

Sounds like a long term friendship, do whatever you can to save it.
He probably feels you are taking advantage of him and intentionaly not paying the bill. He probably also looks at the deer processing as a separate deal, something you offered out of friendship.
Approach him with cash in hand, appologize for forgetting the bill and see what he thinks is fair. If he is way out of line, or gets rude about it then do whatever to get your furs out and leave.
I have seen many friendships end over a urinating contest because neither is big enough to step up and make a move at fixing the problem.
If it were me I would probably go overboard to get the situation resolved, after all it is a long time friendship. But if he continued to try to push the line, then the friendhsip would definately change.

hes havin a bad day let it go.

My guess there's more going on then just the electrical bill. Maybe to him your tendency of forgeting things is wearing on him and he's just drawing the line.

Seems he's nice enough to let you trap his property and plus store your furs and all he wants in return is a little more respect and for you to cover the cost. Seems fair enough to me and he really shouldn't have had to ask you to pay as you should of returned the respect and remembered.

Sorry to sound harsh but this might be the case.

Thanks Possumslayer,Your right it is a long term relationship.I have always tried to take the bigger role and bite my tongue when he feels like jumping down my throat when things don't suit him.
Now,I don't back down but I will go away until we both cool down and I tend to take a few days to cool off when he feels like running his pie hole(not speaking for a few days tends to set him off as well,we are a little different in the way we deal with things,he tends to want instant satisfaction and I tend to think things over for a few days)
I will make good on the freezer bill and see what happens.But I hate it when I'm in a pickle and have to rely on someone else.I've always prided myself on doing things myself and not asking for help.But right now i have no choice but to bite the bullet.

racerboy108,you may be right.After 33 years of friendship I'm sure we have both rubbed each other the wrong way a time or to.Never have gone farther then exchanging just words.
Also,I find it doesn't pay to keep a tally of how many things you've done or not done in a friendship.Much like being married I suppose.LOL

Sounds like you made a deal with him before hand and you didnt stick to your end. Did you have a deal with the deer? Like buthering his deer would cover the electric? Or you just did it? Deal or no deal? Cant make the rules up as you go along.

No ultimatum as I see it, only the pressure to bring your mind back to the original deal. Pay it and then walk away from storing your stuff there any more, save the friendship if you want to, or bring up the forty dollars cut fee and ruin whats left of it !!!

However there are lots of things left out of this whole deal and most here just can't sit and pass judgement on one side of the story.

Hopefully both of you learn from this and can remain friends.

Dale, I have only one thing to say about this. Friends (like wives) don't give ultimatims without expected repercussions. Pay the electric, turn and walk away, and leave his property alone for a while. Eventually he'll realize that what he did wasn't very friendly. It works, trust me on that.

I agree with most everything said above. If it were my shed, I would've told you to plug your freezer in, no problem. I would figure you'd be bringing over some beer sometime, but wouldn't hold you to it and wouldn't ask. Least that's how we do things round here.

Pay your bill (and a few dollars more for his troubles)then take your freezer elsewhere.

with me being hot headed, i'd tell him to stick it after i got my freezer and fur, but if he truly is a friend, you should probably do like the others say, and try to make good on everything. after all, good friends are hard to come by

Maybe it is just that time of the month .... for his wife and she is on him about it ... Garry-

pay the bill, take your freezer off his place won't have to worry about it then. Before long he will want something from you

In any kind of deal involving money you can find out things about friends you never suspected.

If he says he doesn't know how much the tally is, offer to pay him in the springtime. Plug one of those wattmeters in the outlet then the freezer into that, it'll tell you energy use. Then just double it. If he dissagrees pick up your ball and go home...

Sounds like a real good friend you have there. Don't send him my way! I don't need any enemies. Do you think a friend of 33 years is that good of one if he gives you an ULTIMATUM like that? Or would a good friend "remind" you of something you may have forgotten?
Seems to me you've paid him already with the processing and all. You wanted our take... mine is, get your stuff, find a REAL friend and call it even.

Since you asked, and from what you said, my take on it would be that I don't see a valued, functional "friendship" operating here.

An ultimatum from any source is basically a demanding final statement of some flavor. It more or less expresses an implied threat with serious penalties if his terms are not met or accepted.

A real friend would not pounce with such lack of diplomacy or consideration.

Talk to the guy straight up with a no nonsense posture and remind him of value for value in what seems to be a fair trade agreement between you two. He apparently isn't reciprocating in kind as these types of arrangements between friends should flow in comfort for both parties.

If he balks or persists exercising his male menopausal dysfunction as a bully, write that 33 year relationship off and park it in your walk along life's path history files.

Haul your freezer home and find another property to trap. Real sincere friends are far and few between. That guy wouldn't qualify to be on my list as being one of them.

If any of what I said seems harsh in any way, it was meant to be. You did ask, didn't you?

End of the hunt!

Jonathan

Its not your friend.

Its his wife.






Take him beer.